"Look, ma, no han–"
"PUT YOUR HANDS BACK ON THAT BIKE, BOY."
This is a short video demonstration of a self-balancing motorcycle built by Honda. Impressive, but this is 2017, I want to see a motorcycle that drives itself and can go do my grocery shopping for me. Don’t get me wrong, I love the grocery store, it’s just the other shoppers I can’t stand. MOVE YOUR CART. Jesus, you’re sideways in the middle of the aisle, how did you even get like that?
In a global debut at CES, Honda unveiled its Riding Assist technology, which leverages Honda’s robotics technology to create a self-balancing motorcycle that greatly reduces the possibility of falling over while the motorcycle is at rest.
Wait — what happened to kickstands? I thought those were working just fine, plus don’t cost that much. Still, this will make it easier to do all those motorcycle stunts I’ve always dreamed of. And I do like the bike’s follow feature. Apparently if you tap it on the front fender and tell your bike that it’s a good boy it’ll follow you on its own. Who knows, maybe your bike will come to your rescue one day when you’re getting bullied for being the new kid in town. Or maybe its sensors will get dirty and it’ll ram you into traffic. That’s the best part about the future: it’s unpredictable. The worst part about the future? "The apocalypse." Yep, not looking forward to that.
Hit the jump for the video.
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