For everything from family to computers…
So I turn 35 today. Wow. Guess what?! It doesn’t feel any different.
I just hope I get wiser. Mid-life crisis? I have no time for that unfortunately. 😛 I wanted to thank God, family and friends for wishing a happy b-day. Another year to strive to please God. That’s all.
Nothing new. And definitely nothing to see here. Move along people. 🙂
This past Wednesday, our church was given an opportunity to participate at a Montrose Street Outreach Service. They meet in the small parking lot behind near downtown. We met up at 6:30 pm and there were quite a few people already, some from other churches and good portion from the street.
Since there were too many people, I tried to stick with just one person. There was a rather outspoken lady in a wheel chair. Don’t let her disability fool you, Terry, or as she said she prefers to be called sometimes, “Sister T”. 🙂 A Caucasian lady approximately of age over 60+. She seemed to have her entire life strapped onto that chair.
At first, she seemed a bit… intrusive and … wordy. We struck up a conversation about Elvis, of all people! 😀 She told me how she met Elvis before he was big. She also asked how many grammies he had won. I said maybe at least 50? She said ‘no’ and answered “3”. All were from gospel music. Not sure if that’s true but if true, wow.
She had a rough past since childhood. She is from the west Texas and things have never been easy. She eventually turned up in Houston and has been here ever since. In all the 2 to 3 hours I spent with her, in worship service and conversing, I was able to see through her mean-looking exterior and discovered a beautiful lady who was beyond confident when it came to one: Christ. Despite her environment, she was able to always find God and his providence and protection for her. It was hard to think that she was a homeless person. Not just that, but she had an uncanny researching skill using the Internet!
Her electric wheel chair was given by helping this one guy who had been trying to find some info on a property in the northwest of Houston. When she said she could help, many around her scoffed at her, but Terry is a very strong person. She ignored those people and got him the answers. That’s how she wants to make a living and it’s evident when you find out her e-mail address: neighborhoodrenewal@yahoo.com. She’s something else.
She does speak. A lot. And can seem irritating at first. But when I got past that, her confidence in Christ and His provision was just astounding. Simply put, shameful for someone like me… that my confidence in God is not even close to her level. She was also a veteran homeless. She didn’t care so much about “less useful” things like candies, but wanted clothing and socks. There was never a dull moment being with her.
Additionally, after nearly 3 hours on the outside, it was hard to imagine how the homeless without shelter survive these tough winters. My hands were shivering and my head was spinning from the weather. I can only pray that there will be more opportunities to help. It was a humbling experience, one that I didn’t expect. But then again, that’s God. 🙂
Yesterday was Ash Wednesday… the day to mark the beginning of Lent, a 40-day period to prepare for the agony and pain that Jesus went through and 40 days reflect the length of time he spent in the desert. Prior to this day, my stress level has been … surmounting lately. I thought I’d share this with the few that read this and ask for your prayers.
1. My mother-in-law’s health has been worsening with her liver no longer allowing her to take any medications, having gone through two surgeries for her eyes, and knees, and because of the liver, they can’t perform surgery on her neck, which has been giving her lots of pain. Her siblings all but two have died of liver cancer, and she shows symptoms of the same disease. I’m afraid that she may not have much time left… 🙁
2. Because of my mother-in-law’s health condition, Soojin has been stressed out about it, and cries a lot of times regarding this… even more so thinking that she can’t help take care of her mom.
3. So naturally, before her health diminishes even further, we planned to visit her this year in Korea, but as most know, plane tickets are not cheap. I’m looking at easily $4000 to $5000 for 4. That’s not a small amount and it’s stressing me out.
4. Unfortunate misunderstandings and timings have brought some bad situation to some of my relationships.
5. My parents haven’t been doing too well either.
6. I’ve had a severe headache for over a week where everything above my sinus have been giving me so much pain that I couldn’t concentrate. Thought it was allergies at first but upon visiting my doctor, she told me that it’s more likely due to sinus infection. I’m on 3 meds now and the throbbing pain in my cranium seems to have gone… for now.
7. Job has been… frustrating to say the least. Not being appreciated at work by the higher ups, and too much internal politics are killing me.
8. Relatively big task came into my hands at work and that’s been giving me stress.
9. My body pretty much gave out on both Tuesday and Wednesday due to stress, and felt too weak to do much.
10. Both of our cars seem to need the transmissions rebuilt… either that or get a different car(s). 🙁
10. Finance (and managing it) has never been my forté and making ends meet is becoming more and more difficult.
Things, honestly, look very bleak right now… but as Ash Wednesday reminds me, I need to keep in my mind how much more of pain and suffering Jesus had to endure for our sakes. May God give me strength to carry on, wisdom to manage, and the discernment to choose wisely.
Anna’s first year in public school system has been great. She loves going to school and is always excited about learning… However, there has been a bit of… concern.
There’s this girl in her class that has been saying negative things to Anna. It all started with “You are not my friend” type of simple (but common, unfortunately) negative comments whenever Anna didn’t play with this girl or wanted to control her. Anna is mostly a very sweet girl who gets along with everyone else and tries to be kind. Unfortunately, that’s her weakness as well and so even such statement makes her cry. 🙁
I remember the first time Anna mentioned it. It kind of came out of the blue and she started to cry. So both of us have been telling her to try her best to ignore what she tells her. Well, unfortunately, things have been getting worse. Last week, that girl told Anna that she’s stupid! 😡 Erg… This girl is currently the only child and so tends to try to be controlling and authoritative. Both of us were so mad.
It’s hard to advise a 5-year-old on how to handle such situation. While being a Christian, we want to tell her to just love that girl unconditionally, I told myself that Ann’s 5 years old. She has no concept on what all that means, let alone being able to process how to not let such negative things not affect her. So until I believe she’s old enough to ignore those negative comments and still be able to befriend her, I told her (as calmly and nicely as possible) to avoid her and ignore what she says.
In her first year in school system, all I wanted for Anna to learn is adapt well into the system. I could care less about how smart she becomes or capable or such things. I want her to enjoy the school life. After all, she will be in it for 12 more years! So on Tuesday, we had our 2nd teacher-parent conference. Anna’s teacher is great. She loves her. And the teacher is great for most part. But she’s a teacher nonetheless and with all her responsibilities, this kind of situation was oblivious to her. So after the teacher spoke about her academic progress (and she’s doing just fine even if others are doing superior), I brought this issue with this particular girl.
Now that she’s aware of it, I hope the teacher does a bit more. And I do pray that Anna grows up to be a very understanding and accepting kind of person. But until I think she’s ready to even understand what that means, I am advising her to avoid her. Man, it’s tough being a parent… 🙁
Let me add a bit more to clarify something.
It’s not that I don’t make the effort in reaching out to the less fortunate including the homeless. Yesterday’s turn of events proved that I still try to “segregate” the times I am kind and when I am not, while Soojin’s mentality is continuous flow.
I have been to homeless shelters and special programs and what not. When I approached the gentleman yesterday, I realized that I interact much better if I am prepared in my mind. That in the end means that I have to be prepared 24/7. Internal strife must continue and I must not lose to myself.
Happy birthday Pastor Shawn! 😀
So to celebrate his, Andrew Kim’s, and Eric Song’s b-days, we went across the street to Chipotle for lunch after the service. Nothing too extreme to denote the title thus far, right? Well, after the lunch and the looong stop at Berripop, we headed back to our car. We had to walk back to the church parking lot.
On the way, we noticed a homeless man sitting on the bus stop bench. I tried to hurry along, and try to ignore him. However, Soojin, as soon as we pass him, she says, “Do you think he ate?” At first, I was irritated and annoyed. She then proceeded to suggest that we should buy him something to eat and pointed to Whichwich.
So I sent the rest ahead and I went to buy the sandwich and came back to give him the sandwich. He is all that anyone would think of when you heard the word “homeless”: beard and facial hair everywhere, half asleep, very dark faced, age of 40-something to 50-something. When I approached him, he saw what I had in my hands and got up and said something appreciative that I don’t recall.
Afterwards, I had realized how cold and heartless I was. I am as the title says, a cold-hearted bas****. I’d rather avoid him and turn the cold shoulder rather than be like Soojin who obviously had the heart of Christ in her… definitely more than I had.
You see, this isn’t the first time. Last year during summer, Soojin had noticed this older man selling newspaper on Kirby near 59. His name was Dave. When she first saw him, she again wanted to feed him and give him drink. Everyone has their heroes. Mine is Soojin. She certainly has the heart of a hero of Christ. She is able to see the person that is in need. And sees it right through.
Happy New Year! Yeah… 2008!
Well, really, I don’t know what the big deal is since the concept of “time” is man-made and so we are celebrating what? I don’t feel any different… but I guess I will play along. 😛
We had a good visit to my parents’ for Christmas and New Year… my kids had a blast with their grandparents and cousins. I also got to see some good ol’ friends I haven’t seen in some long time.
– Won Suk Lee, 7 years
– Christine Cho, met her fiancé, Clinton.
– Kevin Wu, 1 year
– Woosuk Sohn, 12 years!
Wish I had seen more friends (like Kwon Young, Will, Paidow, Yuri, Boris, and Ben) but we all have plans and family. We didn’t get to see snow either… so that was disappointing. Now, I’m back at work and just blah-ing…