Category: Personal

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Scout: Korean Movie Review & Politics

I came across this Korean movie entitled “Scout“.  It was about a guy who worked at a university as a baseball scout.  There was a up-and-coming talent from Kwang-ju.  So how can you go wrong with a sports movie, right?!  Wrong!!  🙁

Shoot… don’t wanna mess up your plot but let me point out that it does bring up and rotate around the infamous Korean massacre from 1980.  It was called “Kwangju Massacre“.  Since the Korean general Chun Doo-hwan took over the government via power and coup d’état, Koreans took it upon themselves to protest against the power.  This happened in the city of Kwangju.

I am more than furious about this … watching the movie reminded me of it… now, of late, I have been hearing how they miss both loser “presidents”… Park Chung-hee and Chun Doo-hwan did some nasty and terrible stuff and if I ever hear again how they miss some of these worst humans ever, I’m gonna explode!!  If you are willing to exchange food for people’s lives, you are …. erg.  Forget it.

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Traveling Newbie

Last time I traveled on business was 3 years ago almost and that was my one and only time!  Now that I will be on another one tomorrow, I guess I must’ve some anxiety and/or excitement in me because I dreamed of traveling to somewhere for business.  😛

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Changes at work: CFD Lead Engineer

So since the predecessor at work left a year ago, I have pretty much picked up the slack.

However, it was assumed that the replacement would be not too far.  Well, the primary candidate failed.  The secondary possibility wanted too much money.  So in some sense, by default, I became the lead CFD engineer.  While that may not sound like I deserve it, I have done quite a bit.

While I may not be at liberty to say, I have enabled us to be capable of running a new CFD code now at work, while maintaining two relatively new projects going.  And I will be in charge of training two new guys.  The thing is that those two are higher in terms of levels than I am.  But my manager assured me that I am the lead.  In fact, I will be traveling to Huntington Beach next week as Houston CFD Focal to represent Houston.

Wow.  If you had told me that I’d be here now few years ago, I’d have laughed at you.  Don’t jump the gun and ask for free lunches or dinners ’cause while it is a “promotion”, there’s no pay increase…  at least not yet.  That means, more work for same pay.  Oh well.

I am thankful still, even if I am at where I am by default.  I really do enjoy what I do now.  I thank God for allowing me to get where I am today.  Ironic thing is that I had been thinking about possibilities of moving… but not so sure anymore.

Anyhow, I am getting busier at work so please understand if I don’t write back sooner than I’m used.  😛

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The Ironic Side of Sympathy & Pain

Though it’s spring, I also still hate this time of th year… I have allergies.  I am allergic to most tree pollens and cats and dust.  I’ve been allergic to pollen & spring since I was 15 years old.  However, since moving to Texas, I get to have it twice a year!   Blessed am I!!  😛

Well, another note is that humans are selfish by nature.  We fail to understand (nor do we want to understand) others’ pains unless we ourselves have gone through it.  If I speak about the toughness of allergies with those who don’t have any, I might as well ask a Swahili-speaking person for it!  Unfortunately, same case was for Soojin.  I’ve tried to explain to her how it debilitates me at its peak, as my head spins round and round, sneezing my head off, trying to scratch my eyes and nose, wishing I could cut them off.

She developed a full-on allergy symptoms starting last year.  This year was worse.  She also experienced it a week ahead of me.  Poor Soojin.  This past weekend was my turn.   Currently, my throat area is very irritated at the moment, to say the least.  Cheat area feels inflamed, my eyes are so itchy that I want to just gouge them out!  My nose hurts even from the slightest touch now as it’s beyond being irritated!  Now, unfortunately, Soojin knows what I am going through, and sympathizes with me.

I don’t wish that kind of suffering on anyone, but I suppose that’s the sign of being human.  We simply do not wish to even try to understand others’ suffering unless we have gone through it.  So sad, really…

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Thoughts on Relationships

After writing and sharing about Christine, it made me re-affirm about what it takes to develop great relationships. To refer to a cliché, “it takes two to make the things go right.” 😛 I always make the effort to reach out, but I can only reach out so much, and without any feedback or reciprocation, it’s hard to not only tell if the other person appreciates what you do, but also makes it hard to know if the other person wants more in a relationship. And I mean this in as generic tone as possible.

Friendships and relationships are a two-way street. If it’s only me that makes the effort, the relationship can only go so far. However, when both sides take chances at investing in the relationship, things really start to pick up. Also, being a human, I can only make so much of an effort in reaching out, and unless/until the other person takes a step closer to me (even if it’s only a tiny baby step), my relationship with that person won’t develop as much. Just a 2 cents. Any thoughts?

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Good news for our “little” sister Christine!

Christine has entered our lives in a flash and have really changed our lives!  She has a very rare disease called Devic’s disease, one that affects one’s nervous system… well, as loyal readers would know, it has led her to temporary but lengthy blindness.  She can see a bit and one would think that such rare and difficult disease would bring you down, but not our Christine!

She has been more than a trooper over the little over past year we have known her.  She is very frank and honest and does not hold herself back.  Well, one of her doctors recommended her for an experimental treatment using Rituxan, a medication used to treat cancer.   The drug does similar things that needs to be done to treat someone like her.

Well, that was end of last year.  She has been bravely, and patiently, trying to get an appointment to be treated.  Yet, because her condition is so rare and the medication is for cancer patients, unlike herself, things have been… complicated.  But she has shared that she finally got through the red tape and got the appointment scheduled for 26th of the month!!  I am so happy for her… and how she has held herself through these past years.  If I had to pick my own “Person of the Year”, she would definitely get it.  Right Christine?!  😀  Hope this wasn’t out of line…  Soojin and I couldn’t be happier or more thankful to God for introducing someone so amazing to our lives.  I don’t think she sees how much an encouragement and challenge she has brought to us.

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CCSC Experience

Though schedule seemed to conflict, I was able to make it to CCSC this past Saturday to volunteer.  CCSC stands for Christian Community Service Center, and our Pathways Church has been volunteering every second Saturday of the month.

As I chewed on my turkey sandwich, I was trying to think of what to share, I realized that this past Saturday was very special for me.  It was my first time to serve as an interviewer!!  :O  You see, CCSC has a building near our church where they open up to help out those who are in need of financial, food, and clothing help.  Families, who may have been stricken with some kind of tough situation, like losing a job, and needed some food to get by, or help with paying rent or bills come to seek help here.

It’s a great place.  I’ve been serving here mainly in pantry and administration side of things for past year, but never had the opportunity (or even dreamed of) to serve as an interviewer!  So needless to say, I was very surprised when Ruth, the head honcho Korean-American lady that runs the place on that Saturday, asked me to interview!!  I panicked!  What if I miss questions, what if I forget to include something… what if I… but most importantly, what if I ask or say something stupid to offend these people who are in need!  The last thing they need is to be offended by my saying something totally insensitive!  🙁

I watched another interviewer in action for a while and then Ruth asked me to interview this one man who needs to leave soon for an interview!  So trying not to look too nervous, I asked him to come in.  Shook hands and introduced myself.  Told him I was a total newbie at this and apologized in advance of my mistakes and any other shortcomings.  This man had things going… his occupation was an accountant but lost job due to illness and was always looking for contract work inbetween.  He told me himself that he gets very sensitive and proud.  This told me that he probably didn’t want to be here, if at all possible.  And his record showed just that.  His visits were sporadic, and due to an illness that I can’t mention, things were going rough for him.

This is when I told myself to look beyond the appearance and the voice of this man.  This man is in need of help, I told myself.  He doesn’t need me to criticize him on his personal skills, but for me to just be kind and courteous and get him through the paper work so he can grab some food for himself and leave in time for his interview.  Prior to this experience, it was hard to really get a face-to-face time with these people in need, and thus made feel more and more segregated… and left me feeling… different from them.  This interview process totally changed that.

I wanted to make God proud of me, just as any human tends to try to get his/her parents proud of him/her.  So I put my opinions aside and just helped.  I hope to be able to serve as an interviewer more often… a bit selfish on my part… so that I can connect with these people in need better… and closer.  It was a good day.