Kids and Discipline

There’s one thing I can’t stand… kids who are spoiled.  Oh, don’t  misunderstand me.  I spoil my kids with love as much as possible but there’s also a wrong and bad kind of spoiling, the kind that makes the kids behave badly.  So it’s my life’s goal to make sure my kids aren’t that way.  I want them to grow up to respect others and their property the way they’d want to be treated.

Well, boys sure are difficult.  JJ is proving to be quite a handful.  While Anna loves to help out and obey us fairly well, JJ on the other hand, doesn’t.  He’s quite defiant actually.  We’ve told him over and over.  On top of that, he knows that he’s loved so it aids in his being defiant.  Soojin is not helping in that department (but he’s so cute)!

But in the event of disobedience, we have to be firm.  That happened… again… tonight.  After bathing them, I let them play a bit.  Well, to my not-so-surprise, I find out that JJ drew on the wall with a green crayon!    Oh he knows better.  He probably figured I’d just slap his buttocks a bit and move on… well, this wasn’t his day.  I took him aside and talked to him about what he did wrong, what we had told him not to do (which is not to draw on walls and that’s what papers are for).  I took the official punishment stick (aka. wooden rice scooper ??).  I gave him good slap on his hands.  And thighs.

I hate these displinary moments… but I refuse to let my kids grow up improperly.  I understand more and more what my parents had to go through… inside.  This hurts.  Whoever said that love hurts, knows a lot about life.  This time, very literally.  I told him as before, that whenever he got punished, I’d be as well, to share in his pains, and as an act of my taking responsibility in my shortcomings as a parent.  My thigh and hands hurt.

Whoever tells me that spanking and disciplining is easy don’t love their children.  But I didn’t want to cry in front of my son.  Not yet anyway… perhaps on the rainy days of his teenage hood.  The innerds of my heart hurts whenever I discipline them.  I don’t know why but this time was more difficult… perhaps it’s because I know that I will have to repeat this more with my son in the future.  In the mean time, after the explanation (aka. the lecture), I hugged him.  And massaged his wounds.  This must be what God’s grace and mercy must be like.  And this must be like how God feels after spanking us for our disobedience.  I held him for good five minutes until his tears somewhat stopped.  Then he ran to his mom.    I do hope he grows up to understand… but he won’t truly… until he becomes a dad himself.

Here’s to all the dads that had to discipline their kids but loves them to the end…

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